The third phase is much the longest, and last a minimum of six months, and usually a lot longer. Anger and guilt from the second phase continue. There will be outbursts of rage, probably directed at someone unconnected with the infertility. The guilt will be hard for others to understand; the infertile may blame themselves, for instance, for having been promiscuous when younger, seeing infertility as just punishment. Again there is a concern about being out of control or mad, when people find themselves lashing out at anyone and everyone. Anxiety may be very prominent with childhood fears re-emerging. Nightmares and fear of being left alone are common, and ordinary activities such as going shopping or visiting become almost impossible they are so beset with fears. This may be exacerbated by the stigmatization mentioned earlier. The inevitable result is loneliness, which in turn exaggerate the feelings of isolation. It should be remembered that it is not uncommon for people, erstwhile friends, to avoid contact because they cannot cope with their discomfort with the distress of the infertile couple.

As with the earlier phase tears are frequent, unpredictable and may be embarrassing. There is great sadness, not just for the couple but possibly also for their parents if they have been longing to be grand parents. Coupled with this will be feelings of hopelessness and helplessness.